Today, I came home, nothing much to do. I chilled after after a week of hell and my hockey practices are just killing me. Not a lot of sleep, stress and frustration. There is a girl that I met in the bible study, she wanted me to improve her skating ability. She is from McGill and she is doing her Master for teaching psychology. Often, her work can be stressing, I wanted to help her to enjoy her leisure but the family's politic had prevented me from doing so. I don't know..........it is just the way life should be, it sucks for some people. Constantly people underestimate you, and in fact they know nothing about you or they just very ignorant and they just want to discourage. That's constantly happening during my lifetime. I mean leisure has made me learn about myself not just my ability but also the world around me. You will never receive the perfect answer, and even though you do the right things and that's not mean you will receive the right respond. The weekend before, I went to a bible study, and I learned the most valuable lesson and it can be sad depends on you. One of the speaker had told us about his personal experience when he was doing his master. He said that when he was about 20 years old, he worked so hard to get perfect marks. He expected that if he worked hard and get perfect marks, he will have the job that he wants it. He did managed get perfect marks like he received all A in every class, but he did not receive the job he wanted. The lesson of his speech is that don't expect nothing from your life because God has plan for you. It might be hard to believe it for some of you guys but that's true, that's why there is a CoCoLa advertisment that sang about "You cannot always get what you want" I remembered that I used to laugh about that song, don't care about what he was trying to tell me. Now I do, but how I did? It is through leisure, through out my life, I love every single moment in sports. In addition, I was always a top athlete and counted as one most talent player. During high school, I won Ice hockey championship, and I was a top rugby player in Cegep which I had never played rugby before. I was a talent golfer, I never learned how to swing a ball but I still managed to be able to swing properly and hit the ball without any instruction. My dad was impressed, my golf coach told me that if I had started early, I could be the top women's golfer in the professional league. I never knew that how talent I was in sports but also never knew that the things would not go the way you want to. Frustrate as it sounds, but that's the way life is. Some people just don't appreciate what you had done and you cannot do nothing about it. I was not prepared for this, I started to use leisure as a way to escape my pain; I drank heavily during my trip to South Carolina with my Cegep colleagues. We partied every night and each one of us always got drunk at the end. I was drunk in almost every party, I was so drunk that my emotional bursts out so loud in the bathroom that I ended up waked one of the supervisor, I throw up and I could not even walk properly. I looked like a fool, and I was shame of myself. Now, after I took the bible ( as my leisure in the beginning), I am more prepared than before. You have to believe in yourself and work hard for everything you do but don't expect the result. God has plan for you, that one lesson had helped me through out my life, I can use this knowledge to deal with other things in my life. For instance, I don't know what is going to happen to me next year in hockey but all I know that I need to put an effort in every practice and improve myself as much as I can and see from there. I do not expect nothing from now and in the future, but I know what I need to do now. I never expect that I will learn such valuable lesson in a leisure where I spent the least time which is the bible study. One fact that I know wherever is going to happen to me, it's not in my control, but one thing that I know that I will not make the same mistake again.
